Loving Yourself, Being Grateful, and Attracting Abundance

             When we are more at peace with selves we can see the world in a Happier light. Usually at dinner I get worked up when things aren't going as I expect, but this time I was relaxed because I wasn't judging myself for not being perfectly prepared. I was just calmer and okay with everything and everyone. The more I learn to accept myself with all my negativity the more I stop judging everyone else and myself. It's really true that when we are happy inside can see the world better, with less hate. It's also since I started taking care of my needs before my daughter. I always felt selfish for doing that, but since the therapist told me I can't be present with my daughter if i don't take care of myself in my emergencies of slipping into trauma, I let myself go and it makes my daughter less antsy too. Because she feels more grounded when I do, even if she is not being paid attention to. 

          I also realized that when I take care of myself and don't judge my inside, I can attract more abundance. For example, I don't always get in the mood to sing to my daughter, but when I start feeling good about myself it comes naturally and it puts us both at peace when I sing from my heart, automatically making my life feel effortless. Also, when I'm happy I can do cooking and cleaning without it being a burden, whereas when I'm stuck in the trauma vortex everything feel less possible and dragging- I find myself laying in my bed feeling stifled thinking of all my chores for the day.

           Ralph Smart says that being grateful is a powerful thing because it attracts abundance. This is so true, and I realized that by doing for myself I can feel grateful for everything else in my life so it all falls into place. And abundance attracts more abundance. People who are negative actually predict their life to be that and that's why there are many miserable people working like crazy and still not making enough money. 

          But this also ties into how you were brought up to believe in. Babies who were abused and ignored will always expect that scenario in their lives, and make sure to attract it subconsciously because it's all they know. UNLESS the person processes their trauma and changes their brain wires.

          Good experiences does that for a person, and a conscious effort to bring happy feelings into their lives. For example, since I'm not used to feeling understood I have to work harder to believe my husband understands me, and keep proving it to myself by letting myself open up to him and making sure I get a response that lets me know he is there. I need to consciously bring in people who show me they care and not the opposite. And then I will attract a new way of thinking and a new belief, that I am lovable and deserve to be happy. And I can then have appreciation for life, and do that effortlessly eventually!! It's soo exciting.

            But I still have to know that I fall sometimes, and I'm not perfect. That's part of loving myself too, because it's accepting my flaws too. That is unconditional love. And the more I am doing that, the more I can jump right back into the happy times without wallowing in my mistakes too much. Eventually, they will become less and less present in my life, and I'll catch them right away when they come. Because the more conscious we are of our triggers, the less scary and large they start to be. I'm no longer very embarrassed of my insecurities, and that's a start.