Authentic
Teal Swan came out with a perfect video this weekend that made me cry. Called How To Be Authentic. She said people do not know how to be authentic and are copies of one another, trying to fit in. We have lost our ability to know how to be authentic because when we were born, the natural process of developing into who we truly are (I forgot the analogy she used for this) was not allowed by our parents, and we lost the ability to know what We truly want, aside from being perfect for what They want us to be. Then, it gets ingrained in us by society how to be as well, and those of us who are terrified of being authentic at all are covered the most from our true selves, being the furthest from who we really are. We develop personas and fake acts because of shame of being vulnerable.
But she says there is coming a time where we are headed towards being fully authentic as the norm, and truth will be accepted by all. This means we will be free to admit our feelings, instead of getting mad and covering up the reasons for it because of self-pride. We will be able to say, "I am really angry now because I feel hurt and it makes me feel rejected." That will be a glorious time. I am looking forward to it, because then I will finally be able to feel normal in my being vulnerable, when all those around me shun me and make me feel crazy for it. She said that we are humans and will never be able to fully be authentic because we always have some inner shame to deal with, but instead of fully hiding it, we should be able to admit, this part of me is embarrassed to admit that I am wrong about so and so. I have been moving towards doing this more, and when I admit my flaw to myself, it makes it easier to feel good about other things I am doing Right and does not seem as daunting. I am a shameful person, and that is okay to be. I can still get up again and try harder next time. And this makes me stay in a peaceful state, whereas before I would shut down and feel discouraged from continuing to even try to be good.
I am also still getting used to the idea that I can say no to people, even family, and stay away if I don't want to hang out with them. Family Tree Brand Life Coaches video called The Power Of Intentional Disappointment... talks about this. In enmeshed families, parents use children for their own validation, and to get away a person needs to be able to deal with disappointing their parent by saying no. This makes them self differentiated. I hope my husband and I can do this.
But she says there is coming a time where we are headed towards being fully authentic as the norm, and truth will be accepted by all. This means we will be free to admit our feelings, instead of getting mad and covering up the reasons for it because of self-pride. We will be able to say, "I am really angry now because I feel hurt and it makes me feel rejected." That will be a glorious time. I am looking forward to it, because then I will finally be able to feel normal in my being vulnerable, when all those around me shun me and make me feel crazy for it. She said that we are humans and will never be able to fully be authentic because we always have some inner shame to deal with, but instead of fully hiding it, we should be able to admit, this part of me is embarrassed to admit that I am wrong about so and so. I have been moving towards doing this more, and when I admit my flaw to myself, it makes it easier to feel good about other things I am doing Right and does not seem as daunting. I am a shameful person, and that is okay to be. I can still get up again and try harder next time. And this makes me stay in a peaceful state, whereas before I would shut down and feel discouraged from continuing to even try to be good.
I am also still getting used to the idea that I can say no to people, even family, and stay away if I don't want to hang out with them. Family Tree Brand Life Coaches video called The Power Of Intentional Disappointment... talks about this. In enmeshed families, parents use children for their own validation, and to get away a person needs to be able to deal with disappointing their parent by saying no. This makes them self differentiated. I hope my husband and I can do this.
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