Aging Narc Father

        It is interesting to me how Lisa Romano said in her video Caring For Aging Narcissistic Parent And Letting Go, that when her aging father is losing all his supply because all of his kids now see him as the narcissist he is and his wife has dementia, he is now becoming needy and desperate for attention, instead of the angry, insulting man he used to be. She said she tries her best to teach him about his trauma of childhood affecting his personality and how he is able to change, but he calls it BS. She does not care because she learned that she can let go of feeling responsible for him and let him make his own life decisions, being that she cannot control him. She said if he were to commit suicide, she would mourn but not take the blame, but hopes for a better outcome of course.

           This was insightful to me because of my own father's aging. He is so needy and made himself unable to walk without help, although he has no outright health issue. I do the same thing and try to teach him about his childhood affecting him, but he too is extremely needy and does not know how to feel good on his own. Lisa says her father is a constant state of neediness, and takes all the pity he gets all the time unless he is sleeping or eating something. My father is in a similar state. I feel bad, but cannot carry it on my shoulders. He told me about a memory he had when I brought up if his mother screamed all day at him as a child, because he was screaming about my daughter "hurting herself" by touching a drawer, and he said he remembers his mother pushing him in a carriage as a child. So he doesn't see her abuse of him.