Learning About my Wound

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I had a pang of missing someone that was very dear to me, a desperateness to see them yesterday. This void is familiar to me but usually a toxic person or compulsive actions fuel it. It was like I integrated its true need in me, maybe through the forum and blog of seeing proof in adoptee feelings. 

In addition I told off my biological uncle, who always tries to paint his family as pure and innocent with words like, "they did it because of the shame of society for keeping children out of wedlock.." and I always felt uneasy about it and unready to accept it. I realized that as maddelinehattuer blog said, there is no excuses for not keeping your baby it is the furthest from morality and more a hide-behind-religion. I felt this way, because from their actions I never got to know my ancestors and where I belong in the world. I told my great uncle that, and how I still never feel their love for me and that I am the first on my tree that I am creating in the world. He said he is there for me, thankfully, but I said time will tell. He then answered that the bond is eternal. Yup something I am struggling all my life to accept, because my physical grandparents never showed unconditional eternity bond with their offspring when they severed her from their family without return. 

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