First Cousin 2nd time Reunion

Friday I went out with birth cousin, and we met at a mall. She was very easy going, and answered every thing I said and told me stories about her life such as why she lived where she did and how her landlord set rules for the people in the building such as needing to get a job. She was worried and looking to move, sad that her decorated and lovely home she would have to leave. She was genuine, but also a bit dogmatic about certain subjects. She was willing to see how adoptive families are possessive and how that affected me, but not so much about my insecurities. Our religious differences seemed to cut a huge hole in our talk, and we avoided it or quickly explained some of it away. My biggest disappointment came when her baby daughter cried in my loving arms and I held her to show compassion and she tried to shush her after she took her ten minutes later because she was on the phone and the baby still hadn't let up. I explained about babies have feelings that need to be let out and she said it bothered her to see her daughter cry. She suddenly looked naive and in pain and my heart went out to her. I encouraged and supported her. But she seemed too uncertain. Her 6 year old son listened raptly and then said, Mom how come you call me names? To get a reaction from me. I figured I couldn't repair all the issues here so I kept quiet. Just showed him how my daughter wanted to be his friend and was not trying to hurt him by watching and talking to him. They only know what they are used to, and my cousin seems to have an iron grip on her 4 kids. At only 27 years old.

Anyway, I hugged her as we left, told her it was so nice to see her. She brightened and smiled at the warmth. I felt it was right too, because although we were both uncertain we still needed each other. As one of the only cousins that tried to connect.