Appreciation for My Birth Sister

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It was nice to chat with my birth sister, to receive support and acceptance. And the understood care and unconditional love we have for one another. Like how every word we said to one another was lapped up like honey. We spoke about comparisons of our children, how they both like helping so it may be genetic, how she calls her son a Janitor from the past life.. How he had no problem weening.. How he has green eyes and my daughter's hair got lighter.. It all felt surreal. Like it was there but too good to be true. Actually talking to a blood sister. After all my life of having none by my side. I wanted to cry a few times when we spoke about feelings. I felt her pain when she spoke about her loyal feelings towards her adoptive family, and the awful neglect from our birth mother. When she and I both said we wished we knew our other brother, but he wouldn't trust us to meet us. How even though we don't think about him as often, when we do it is with pain and worry for him. My life is real. Not a fairy tale.  I am allowed to exist. She got it about my adoptive family being too unemotional and not good for me to be with them. Even though she still leans on her adoptive family for support. She admitted that she needed them for support. Maybe that's why so called grateful-only adoptees need to pretend they don't care about their true roots- because it would feel too empty and un-rooted. Lol pun there. I pushed her a bit with admitting it was not all roses and sunshine, because we adoptees undeniably have different blood and ancestors.. And you need to know where your spiritual dna comes from in order to know where you can go. She was silent, and that meant agreeing. It was nice to have an emotional talk with my very blood sister and see how we mesh so easily. Both get deep concepts pretty fast.

It's not over, even though we spoke for over 2 hours and said so much. We still have to talk more to keep it up and we will. I am learning that relationships are not temporary. And not perfect either. I sense pain there. She told me she came to accepting a lot of new sides to her self, like being open to realizing why she got so triggered when our mother rejected her son- because it triggered how she hurt her as a child. This also allowed her to accept pain more. She did not protest as much as last time about adoption being a big thing that happened to us. She understood why I want to know my birth family as she does too now.

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